Death's Second Self

I've been searching for a good dream that night...

I failed to do so... Still, I'm awake.

The usual night I had for days... Morning came...

Thank God. My friends visited me a while ago. A past classmate celebrated his birthday, Michael Zafra.

We went there for some smoke and drinks... as always "gran ma"... I actually had fun.

Ironically, after so, we went to church. Yeah, it's Sunday! I think it's a good thing. After a sin, ask for forgiveness...

I was kind of disturbed with the priest's homily this time. (Necessary digression, last week, we went to UP Church, I had concluded that the priest's sermon was very shallow.) Tonight's homily was very moving...

I love the quote that he had stated at the middle part of his sermon, "...ang kamatayan at pagtanda ay hindi dapat maging sanhi ng takot bagkus ng paglagok... hindi dapat ituring na isang daan na dapat tahakin bagkus dapat yakapin..." He said that he quoted it from a book called "Aging".

Quite true right?! I had learned from my highschool years a saying, "...paano mo maiintindihan ang kamatayan kung hindi mo pa naiintindihan ang buhay..." I think I really don't need to think about death and aging and all the things related to it. Although I believe I need to be futuristic somehow, I wanted to live each day as the very sole moment I have. I wanted to cherish every minute of my life. Living my life to the fullest will be my goal this time. I realized that it is not that bad to cope with the changes around you (whether good or bad). You'll be more intellectual if you will experience everything that can be experienced! Remember, experience is the best teacher. That's why I wanted to, at least, have a little knowledge of everything (even if it's wrong).

At least, if I'll die, I will never regret anything for I have done all the things I wanted to do even if I'll be miserable in a way.

I was really struck by the priest's homily. I was really happy that I went to church this night! Not a wrong choice.

Death's Second Self: It is, according to Prof. Yapo, is the phase of life that you reminisce all the moments you have gone through... I wanted my death's second life to be of pure happiness... only happiness... although I'll be reminiscing sad moments and mistakes, at least, I have done what I really wanted. I'll be satisfied!

Death... certainty of its coming, but uncertainty of its occurrence...